|Posted on December 4, 2010 at 11:44 AM|
Well, it arrived; like the grim reaper burying everything beneath its evil blanket of pretence! The Christmas card effect looks beautiful whilst looking out of the window, but for the elderly or infirm, snow isn’t a welcome sight. My plans for the week have been well and truly thwarted by the offending stuff. It’s difficult enough managing a debilitating illness which regularly has you prisoner in your own home for prolonged periods. The addition of treacherous weather really does add insult to injury!
The cruel reality of life was brought to the fore yesterday after it became apparent I wasn’t going to be able to see my sister. Who, having lived in Spain for twenty two years is over on a brief visit. I was looking forward to spending the evening with my parents, two sisters, niece and youngest son. It must be three years since I last saw my niece, and eighteen months since I saw my older sister. If I was fit and healthy nothing would stop me trekking through the snow to be with them. Goodness! I remember some horrendous winters during the early 80’s… Snow and ice certainly didn’t deter me back then.
Ironically yesterday whilst feeling so tremendously low I happened to read this…
“The I in illness is isolation & the crucial letters in wellness are WE”
Such a true poignant sentence; sadly I expect only few will understand the profound meaning. I don’t think you ever come to terms with a life compromised by illness: You learn to manage it… To live one day at a time, but it doesn’t stop you wishing that things were different or stop the hurt when you can’t do what others do. I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried into my pillow last night; I’m only human and I’m not ashamed to admit that occasionally I yearn to lead a normal life!
However, today is a new day and I’ve lots ahead to be positive about. I’m so excited to share my news. It’s happened, I’ve signed a publishing agreement; “Raw Emotion” my collection of thoughts in rhyme is due to be released at the end of February. I’ve spent the last couple of months writing the collection and directing what little energy I have towards the project. All the hard work is completed and the rest is in the hands of my publisher; I can’t wait to see my work in print, although it does all seem rather surreal at present.
The local newspaper published my story on Friday, complete with a picture of me with Joshua, my youngest son. I’m not sure how Josh feels about being in the newspaper; although he did mutter something about paying him copyright as the picture was one taken on his seventeenth birthday… An ingenious way of extracting money from me I suspect! The link to the piece can be read below:
I’m afraid I’ve been guilty of not updating my blog quite as often. I’ve been focusing on producing the book, plus winter is a challenging time with symptoms exacerbating in the cold weather. Anyhow, I can now pay more attention to “Shared Experiences” whilst awaiting the release of “Raw Emotion” and eagerly anticipating a new year filled with better things.
For now I will watch the pounds disappear out of my central heating flue, as it constantly ticks over in its almost failed attempt to keep me warm. At least I’m not alone there… The worry of increased heating bills is one more source of anxiety for all of us during this grim weather.
I’m sure a night in front of the television watching X Factor and Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here accompanied by a bottle of red is the light hearted release I need to get me through another lonely, cold night.
SO, until next time Cheers!