|Posted on January 13, 2011 at 8:04 AM|
It’s hard to believe that mid January is upon us and Christmas is all but a distant memory. I for one, am relieved that it’s over; done, dusted and put back in the cupboard so to speak! My artificial tree was reluctantly resurrected after much deliberating as to whether I should erect one at all… I relented just in time for my older children’s homecoming, but by 1st January it was wrestled back into its box unclear as to whether it will see the light of day again… I’m such a ‘bah humbug’ and not afraid to admit it!
On the 3rd January I went into hospital; another new year and more surgery. This time a brief stay to undergo my long awaited eye operation. After being informed on admission that the procedure might not take place as planned, due to having latex allergy… Yes, something else to complicate matters! It did however, go ahead much to my relief.
I’m now nine days post surgery and seeing the world through a much clearer right eye. Although my night vision is worryingly impaired I’m trying to remain optimistic for improvement. I’ve been told it could take 6-12 weeks before things settle down. During the day is a different matter, the dull world I’ve been living in is suddenly brighter, clearer and colourful. White is no longer yellow, but pure, clean and beautiful! Surgery on my left eye will go ahead once the surgeon is confident that the right has been a success. In the meantime, I’m sure I’ll be spending much time admiring the picturesque view of the countryside from my living room window, whilst noticing a world I’d forgotten through a new right eye!
So, my future looks brighter in more ways than one… I’m having a respite from the arthritis which plagued most of last year; the treatment administered in November has arrested the inflammation and pain in my joints, giving me chance to enjoy freedom of movement… I don’t always realise how bad I felt, until I start to feel better. The sad thing is, I know it wont last, but have become adept at taking the good with the bad.
Many of you will know I spent the latter end of 2010 working on the publication of my book “Raw Emotion” I’m very excited as my dream is about to be realised, the book has gone to print and will be available from http://www.silverwoodbooks.co.uk/ by the end of February. I believe it will be listed for preview on Amazon by the end of January. I've decided to support Lupus UK and Breakthrough Breast Cancer, the two charities close to my heart; therefore an annual donation will be made from the royalties of “Raw Emotion” during their awareness month in October.
Last Saturday I received notification of my poem “Do Not Judge” having been chosen for inclusion in an anthology of works by creative UK writers called the “Power Of Poetry.” This will be available through United Press; as yet I haven’t been informed of the release date.
I often talk about the difficulties chronic illness brings, especially with exacerbating factors such as divorce and loss of employment. I seem to have struggled through too many years than I care to remember. So many hopes and dreams have been dissolved by influences out of my control, a life long battle with illness and much sadness in life. My maternal grandmother used to say, “Everything is sent for a reason” her words echo in my psyche often. It isn’t always easy to share that belief, although it’s true to say our experiences shape our existence. If we’ve never experienced illness, how can we appreciate being well? How can we understand someone else’s pain if we’ve never suffered? How could I have written my collection of “Raw Emotion” if I hadn’t felt the emotion required to write from the heart? As the release date draws closer I’m nervous, excited, someone suggested I should feel proud! Strangely, proud has never crossed my mind. Maybe I will feel it when I hold the printed book in my hand for the first time.
I choose to believe 2011 is going to be a better year, I have much to focus on and a new eye to focus with!!!